In early 2012 (Feb 7th to be
exact), at 29 years old, I was diagnosed with an extremely rare cancer called
Choriocarcinoma. The
cancer was caused by my pregnancy and the way that this cancer works is that
the pregnancy hormone (HcG) carries the cancer cells through the body at the
rate of a pregnancy. Normal HcG levels for a few weeks pregnant are around
10,000 and mine were at 284,000. Two days later they had jumped to 500,000 –
the highest ever seen in Ottawa. I had tumors in my lung, spleen, and uterus. I was exclusively breastfeeding my three month old and was given
less than 48 hours to wean him before I would start extremely aggressive weekly
treatments of chemotherapy for the next 5 months.
My sister stepped in to nurse him for me as
he was not taking a bottle well. I assumed I would have to put him on formula because
I didn’t know of any other options until my sister suggested donor milk. I had
never even heard of donating breast milk but that sparked a search for milk for
my baby to see
if I could find friends and family who could donate some breast milk to my
little guy. I did find a few but it wasn’t nearly enough for the amount he was
drinking so I expanded my search to friends of friends which eventually led me
to facebook groups like “Human Milk 4 Human Babies Eastern Ontario” https://www.facebook.com/HM4HB.EasternON which
is a milk sharing group. Essentially healthy nursing moms who have an abundance
of milk post on the page with the amount of milk they are offering (whether
frozen or fresh) and where they are located. At the same time, women like me
who are unable to nurse for a host of different reasons ranging from illness,
to lack of milk production, to adoption, etc are able to post requests for
milk. The moms connect and ask questions about medical history etc and make an
informed decision as to whether or not they would like to take the milk.
Through
the generosity of these selfless women I was able to provide my son with breast
milk for 9 months while I underwent weekly chemo treatments. One of the most
impressive donations I received was a freezer full of milk from a woman over 5
hours away and it was delivered to me by complete strangers who delivered it
all in coolers. Another woman spent weeks collecting milk for me from a group
she was a part of and drove it all to me herself from several hours away – it
too filled my large chest freezer.
I
can’t tell you what it meant to me to be able to give my son nourishing breast
milk instead of formula. It really took a weight off my shoulders at a time
when I needed as much stress off of me as possible. Every single woman who
either donated or brought the milk to me was a gift from heaven.
I
was able to get pregnant a year after finishing chemo and though it resulted in
a seriously high risk pregnancy in which my placenta grew right through my
uterus and we both nearly died (yeah that happened), my baby, although 7 weeks
premature, is extremely healthy and as a precaution I filled my entire chest
freezer with my breastmilk – just in case. I was hoping to donate it to a mom
in need and give back in some small way. I was really hoping in the back of my
mind that I’d be able to help a fellow mom who was going through something like
what I had gone through. Never would I or could I have imagined…
On
June 10th 2014, exactly 2 years to the day after that wonderful woman
with the pro breastfeeding stickers all over her car had collected all that
milk for me and dropped it off from 2 & ½ hours away, I found out that she
had just been diagnosed with cancer – and was also pregnant. In a very odd twist, I was now in her
position and she was in mine. I jumped at the chance to help her collect milk
as she wouldn’t be able to breastfeed her baby and through 10 different women
(and help from Jesus of course) I’ve been able to fill 2 freezers completely
full of milk! I’m also working on raising $1000 for her because I know from
experience how much financial help is necessary during cancer. My husband will
be driving both freezers and all the milk to her on Sunday.
The
reason I’m telling this story is because I really want to bring awareness to
the fact that more breast milk donors are needed. There’s a new milk bank in
Ontario but they are woefully short on milk and of course the milk goes to the
hospitals first to nourish the preemies and extremely sick babies. When my 7
week premature son was in the hospital he was approved for the milk donor
program and the milk he received was from Ohio! There is simply not enough
awareness here in Canada.
Those
of us with healthy babies who are unable to breastfeed for whatever reason are
left to figure out alternative methods that include formula feeding (no thanks)
or trusting fellow mamas with their generous milk donations. Is there a risk to
using unpasteurized milk from another mom? Of course! But clearly it’s a risk
tons of women are willing to make and if there were simply more women willing
to donate to the milk banks perhaps women like us wouldn’t have to take these
kinds of risks. The milk bank is very easy to donate to – you simply need to do
a short phone survey, get some blood work done, and store the milk. They even
pay to have it shipped to them and provide the bottles, etc! http://www.milkbankontario.ca
I
look forward to the day when anyone unable to breastfeed can go to a milk bank
and receive milk for their baby for free. Until then, I will work hard to
spread awareness about the need for donor milk and for now will keep working on
collecting #Milk4Bridget because going through cancer is enough; no one should
have to worry about how to feed their baby on top of that.
